Tuesday, January 17, 2012

T-Baby: So cold in the "D", but not cold enough for street cred.


Well, well, hello folks and welcome to another installment of "Box to Abu Dhabi" brought to you by Irish Kev and boy oh boy have I got a gem for you! If you haven't seen this yet, wait no more! I'll just fire this baby off to you first, then I'll break it down for you...Brace Yourselves..You've been warned!




 Holy mother of God. Did you get through all of that? If you did, congrats! If not, I truly don't blame you.The video starts out, with some guy sleeping on what looks to be a decently mopped checkerboard floor in a diner. What this represents in the beginning of the video, I wish there was some type of explanation, especially once you find out what exactly the song is about. No folks don't keep scratching your head, you'll carve the skin away, this whole video's a mystery leaving you pondering about many things. Just go with it. Oh snap here comes that dope ass hook, Yea. Uh. Yea. Whoa, look at these..gangstas? This T-Baby character looks familiar. I think I've seen her in my neighborhood slapping the shit out of her kid while walking him to the bus stop the other day. Anyway, looks like we have an awful attempt at a soulful chorus. Here I'm getting the notion that she thought up this part while in the shower. It didn't sound good then, didn't sound good when they recorded after. Or ever for that matter."Dead in the water"is the saying I will confidently label the chance of this song from any type of spot in a top 40 hip-hop chart, even 400. Moving along. Okay let's get this scene out of the way. Queue the traditional spilling of the 40's for their dead homies in 3..2..1..there we go. What? No 40 ounce bottles? Are those fucking dixie cups? Look, I know your budget probably wasn't that huge for this, but for a couple extra bucks you could have grabbed more than one bottle, hell maybe a big ass pack of those red plastic cups.  I'm sure these ladies are far from weather forecasters but wherever "The D" is accurately located, but it does indeed sound like it's cold there. It's apparently there because her friends were killed in or on the streets. to know this was to supposed to be a serious memorial tribute song, sends chills down my spine. By the time you get halfway through this video you're wondering if their fallen friends and family are willing to rise from the great beyond to put a stop to this seemingly painful song AND video. Unfortunately we're all not that lucky. May I also point out that one of the lyrics in this song has her reminiscing of her and her friend "hanging and banging" which blatantly insinuates she is a possible hoe, or some of my friends would call a "chicken head". Yep, she looks like a chicken head alright. That or the Predator's sister. That's your opinion. Maybe just mine, I don't know. Moving along. You then see her and her friends dancing sluggishly to this continually annoying beat put together by a Casio keyboard and broken rhymes put in front of it. Talk about salt for your wounds, but yes you must admit you can't look away, much like a train wreck. If you keep your eye on the kid in the video, he stops dancing and starts talking to girl next to him. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that he's probably asking her when he could stop dancing in that random graveyard. Poor kid, it'll be over soon buddy. If you're even still listening to the song itself, the "rapping" isn't even in pace with the song anymore, and at this point, she's just talking. If you stuck around long enough for this whole video, you're on the floor laughing like I was.Well, that's all there is to this ballad of bad hooks, lyrics, timing, video quality, and entire time spent putting this abomination together.Oh well, all's well that ends well I suppose. Off to the desert wastelands you go! Peace out homies!

-Irish Kev